this must be the place.

lately.

 

Life is going quite well.  Work is awesome, I’m getting along with everyone there (including my robot boss and his Spanish wife, chachiiing) and I’m making really good money.  I’m almost done with my grad school applications. I’m starting voice lessons again this week.  I bought a canvas and I’m going to paint soon.  I keep having these premonitions that I’m going to look fondly back on this part of my life.  It’s a little vagabondish, a little bit foolish, but my oh my if it isn’t exactly where I want to be.

In negative news:

  Rant: I can’t believe—and this sounds harsh, I know—that I dated such a pervert for the better part of a year.  That kind of stuff catches up to you, you know?  It most definitely impacts personal and business potential.  The worst part about it is that it’s under this “art” facade, and there’s a pretty thick line between art and smut that some people just cannot grasp.  The sad thing is is that he’s really talented in photography; I hope he ends up “using his powers for good rather than for evil” in the future.  

Okay, got that off my chest.  So, in happier news:

The love between me and Robert has been undulating and twisting and shaping into something even more beautiful than I initially imagined.   God!  I have never woken up next to someone and immediately smiled every single time.  I hate to be all syrupy and cliche, but there just aren’t words for it yet.  I read a quote somewhere that you won’t know until the end of your life exactly who your truest love was, but I have a pretty good idea so far.

Random thought of the afternoon: I find it very uncomfortable to see “older people” (e.g. people over 40) doing beer bongs.  I haven’t even done a beer bong, but something about the imagine is slightly pathetic looking.

That’s all for now.

 

P.S.: People are googling my blog.  Who are you?  Show yourself!

friends.

my life: work, robert, dinner, lunch, breakfast, work, housemates, work…etc

i am in a serious relationship and i’m working a serious job (time-wise, at least) and due to this i feel like i can’t make enough time for my “extras”–painting, hanging out with girl friends, violin, practicing voice, reading–and because of this i am becoming slightly dismayed. the friend thing especially bugs me. i have felt–and since around middle school, mind you–that i am not very skilled in the arena of having female friends. only the friends that have stuck with me since the beginning of time can i socialize well with, and i really have no idea why. i have this internal yearning to have multiple, close female friends, but for some reason girls don’t take well to me. i think i might communicate too much like a guy? i don’t try hard enough? i hope that people try to work to be my friend as well? it’s a conglomeration of questions that I don’t have a lot of answers to. all I know is that i try to a point, but if i don’t feel much reciprocation from the person then i give up pretty quickly. i wish it wasn’t such a process full of niceties and petty conversation; i’d like to meet some people and show them interest and have them show me some back. that’s all i ask.